Psychopathic Parking

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Psychopathic Parking, originally uploaded by conradh.

For some folks it's not enough just to buy the F350 Super Duty truck. Or to buy the crew cab version. Or to get the "FX4 Offroad" package, lift it, and load it up with accessories. No, the important part here is causing a confrontation of some kind, using the truck, so that there can be some manhood and throwdowns and getting up in someone's grill, as they say. A good way to do this is to take two parking spots in a suburban parking lot where you don't belong, when all the other trucks are at the far end of the lot because their drivers were grownups.

Comments

[counterfeitfake.livejournal.com]

get some (http://www.iparklikeanidiot.com/)

[kniwt.livejournal.com]

Or maybe just some carefully slobbered pigeon poop.

Beat the system

[mr-flippant.livejournal.com]

TWO HOUR TIME LIMIT!!!1!

[salome-st-john.livejournal.com]

IT INSERTS THE TRUCK INTO THE VAGINA

Suburban Jihad

[nebris.livejournal.com]

I recommend a liberal squirt of lighter fluid upon the tire by the gas tank, etc. =)

~M~

It's OK

[inobetter.livejournal.com]

Thats the compact version ;)

[hepkitten.livejournal.com]

thats how i always park in my acura

[substitute.livejournal.com]

You gotta stop letting the kids drive.

[magyarok-saman.livejournal.com]

These are the ones a person is tempted to "key" - they park that way so nobody will hit them. :P

Hugs,
Evil L

[ludickid.livejournal.com]

Ayup. That's why God invented nice sharp keys.

[kitchen-life.livejournal.com]

amen.

[trinnit.livejournal.com]

To look at it another way, instead of "protection parking" it could be "well I'll just stop here so I don't hit the curb"

[springheel-jack.livejournal.com]

My plan is one day to leave the house each morning with an indelible marker and a battery-powered dremel moto-tool in my pocket.

[onda-dog.livejournal.com]

Here's what I do. In my glove compartment, I keep a notepad and a small container full of a water/yellow food coloring mix. When I see someone with a shiny new big farm car parked like that, I write a note that starts something like: "Dear Big New Shiny Farm Car Driver: You park like an ass. Go back to your farm." At some point, I sprinkle some of the yellow fluid on the note, not so much that it's drenched but well enough that it's pretty well stained. I do this so that the the final line of the note makes sense: "In case your wondering what that stuff is all over this note, I peed on it."

[halfjack.livejournal.com]

I think it's obvious that the only way the driver can detect that he is bound by two lines from that altitude is to park over a middle line. If he parked properly there would be no way to determine he had done so from up there! I also think that this restricted visibility argument is sufficient to prove the vehicle is not road-worthy and should be banned inside the city limits.

[vegemitelover.livejournal.com]

I think they should remove every other white line and replace the "1 HOUR" text with "1 HUMMER".

Or maybe even just "VAGINA" (credit.. salome_st_john)

[substitute.livejournal.com]

I could probably get Mary to do that.

[foo2rama.livejournal.com]

Once upon a time, a suburban did this in my friends apartments space deficient parking lot. Ironically they had about 5 harvest crusade stickers and the family of Jesus fish and a WWJD sticker. I then wrote the note "I am sure that Jesus would be more respectfull and not used mulitple parking space. The Baby jesus hates bad parkers. Godbless, a Concerned Christian"