substitute

Yes, you can ship your twitter updates daily to Livejournal. But why? What is being accomplished? Tweets are ephemeral by design. If you said "my boyfriend's bringing me cake" at 1300 and "anyone at UCLA know if Parking Log 3B is full?" at 1500 and "Goddamnit I forgot to buy beets" at 1800, why should everyone know about all of these at once the next day?

Can anyone explain why you'd want to post your list of tweets to your Livejournal?

Federal Court Jury Summons

I hope I don't get on a jury. Some of those federal ones go forever, especially financial crimes. But I have actually no possible excuse; I'm their ideal juror.

At least it's a call-in thing. Unless I get called I won't have to spend too much time in the airless Santa Ana Federal District Court Building.

Waaah! I don't want to join this Justice League!

1. Keeping an accurate "new voicemail" flag on a mobile phone. (See Note 1)
   
   
2. Sending a text message from a phone. (See Note 2)
   
   
3. Monitoring the temperature at a data center and keeping the A/C running. (See Note 3)
   
   
4. Receive and file paperwork, first entering it on a computer database. (See Note 4)
   
   
5. Render a web page. (See Note 5)

Note #1: This has been true since the first mobile phone I used. Voicemail flags stick for days, or never appear. The flag will pop up two days after a message is left. Sometimes the victim must reset the new voicemail flag by leaving voicemail for him or herself and then deleting it. How can this be?

Note #2: As long as I've been using SMS, it has failed to send about half the time. The signal bar will show full strength! yay! Then, when an SMS is sent, the phone will tell me that the message in fact cannot be sent. A few minutes later, caught in a lie, the phone admits to having no signal at all and starts trying to find one.

Note #3: Thermometers are cheap. So are loud bells. Summer happens every year! So why is it always the customer who discovers it's 80 degrees Fahrenheit inside? Isn't this job #3 after "not on fire" and "power on"?

Note #4: You're an insurance company. What is it you do there, exactly?

Note #5: When the page causes a browser to look up DNS for five or six ad services, and won't render the page until this is done, DNS then blocks and the viewer either never sees the page at all or gives up in disgust after a minute or two. I can't see how this benefits the advertiser or the website owner or anyone, really. Why even use hostnames? Why a duck? Why not a chicken?

In case you're curious, Saturday night is not all right for DNS misconfiguration, upset producers, lack of access to registrar-level changes, and everyone but me watching a basketball game.