These four simple words

[substitute]

Federal Court Jury Summons

I hope I don't get on a jury. Some of those federal ones go forever, especially financial crimes. But I have actually no possible excuse; I'm their ideal juror.

At least it's a call-in thing. Unless I get called I won't have to spend too much time in the airless Santa Ana Federal District Court Building.

Waaah! I don't want to join this Justice League!

Comments

[eyeteeth.livejournal.com]

I sometimes think it would be interesting to be on a jury but Greg the ADA assures me it will never happen. He says I am too weird and they don't like writers on juries because writers get too involved in the narrative and forget about the justice part.

[substitute.livejournal.com]

"Dress Code: This is a U.S. District Court, and business attire is strongly suggested. Please do not wear tank tops, or shorts. Men must wear shirts with a collar and casual or dress slacks. Ties are not required. Jurors appearing dressed inappropriately will be sent home, without pay, and their jury service will be extended accordingly."

[eyeteeth.livejournal.com]

Sit around during voir dire taking half an hour to put on your shoes. They'll realize you're a writer and cut you loose.

[switchstatement.livejournal.com]

i was going to say it sounds like fun until i saw this. "This is a U.S. District Court." OH WOWEEE. like i'm going to go out and buy a tuxedo because these assholes take themselves too seriously. can't you just pretend you're a member of some group that hates the person on trial? you know, "i'm a communist and think all bankers ought to be in jail for their crimes against humanity," or, "i don't know why a woman would want a job, anyway."

[substitute.livejournal.com]

I can handle a collared shirt and non-jeans pants. It's just sort of funny.

The real problem is that federal cases can go long.