"Black humor" is redundant

[substitute]

1. Courtney sells some of Kurt's songs to... wait for it... Oh don't worry. It's a good thing. edit:The paper is a tabloid, sometimes makes shit up. Story not yet found elsewhere. Great legend if it's fake, though!
   
   
2. Movies come to life as giant jellyfish attack Japan. Wearing tights can be an effective defense. Students have succeed in turning them into tofu.
   
   
3. Today's Woot deal is a really good bread machine for $75, shipped. Go now buy.
   
   
4. Tulane is hacking itself to pieces after Katrina. WSJ story here may require registration. Short version: They're axing 22 programs of study and firing 53 professors and a third of their medical school faculty. Bye bye university.
   
   
5. The data on Tylenol just gets worse and worse. Now it seems that you can poison yourself with 20 pills a day. I bet a lot of neurotic people do that much Tylenol.

Comments

#1

[zebulon-y.livejournal.com]

what the fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck

[nosrialleon.livejournal.com]

I love telling people about Tylenol because NOBODY KNOWS ABOUT IT. Hi, I just drank 9 six-packs... got any Tylenol? AAAAAAAAA! I will only take acetominophen as a LAST resort.

[bethesaurusrex.livejournal.com]

My bottle of off brand Tylenol says in BRIGHT RED LETTERS something along the lines of "PLEASE DO NOT EXCEED RECOMMENDED DOSAGE. DO NOT TAKE WITH ALCOHOL. MAY CAUSE LIVER FAILURE."


Do people have problems with reading comprehension? WHY ARE PEOPLE SURPRISED?!?!??!

[nosrialleon.livejournal.com]

It's amazing, isn't it? People think of it as aspirin and treat it as such and gee, why did my liver fall out?????

[do-not-lick.livejournal.com]

A couple of years ago there was a restaurant near me at which a bunch of people contracted hepatitis from some tainted salsa. At first there were no deaths, so people were calling it unfortunate but not tragic, and then one of the victims did die, and people started calling for blood. At least until the circumstances of his death came to light.

Turns out the guy already had a liver ailment... I want to say cirrhosis, but it might have been something else. Anyways, he eats at this place, gets the HepA, and then isn't feeling well so he takes a big dose of tylenol. People were a lot less upset with the restaurant after that was reported.

'course, the place still went out of business.

Re: #1

[zebulon-y.livejournal.com]

Mirror = only source for the story which means
story = bullshit


whew

[do-not-lick.livejournal.com]

I was thinking about getting that bread machine but I am really not a good cook by any measure and I would worry that it would be too hard for me to work.

Do you have one of those things? Do you think it useable by somebody with no actual cooking talent, but an ability to read and follow directions?

[substitute.livejournal.com]

It's incredibly easy. You dump the ingredients into the thing in a particular order and hit a button. If you want to get fancier you can, but it's not required.

[do-not-lick.livejournal.com]

OK I got one.

[zebulon-y.livejournal.com]

Absolutely, yes. I have that exact model and it does not require any cooking ability at all. You literally dump the ingredients in and press a button.

The only thing that matters is the order in which you dump them (so you don't let the yeast get wet). That's it. Wonderful bread with zero effort.

I have no joke

[leolo.livejournal.com]

But I'd like to point out that a collection of Jelly fish is a SMACK!

[potatohead.livejournal.com]

If you don't mind, could you cut and paste the Tulane story into an email for me? I'd need to register for the WSJ, and after 2 weeks it's not free anymore and I will probably forget to cancel and end up paying for a bunch of stocks and bonds and mumbo jumbo I'll never ever read. I want(ed?) to go to Tulane for graduate school, but I can almost guarantee the program I wanted to go there for is one of those getting the axe. Boooo

but they're still NCAA Division I!

[substitute.livejournal.com]

Tulane Announces Downsizing
In Wake of Hurricane Katrina
By ROBERT TOMSHO
Staff Reporter of THE WALL STREET JOURNAL
December 8, 2005 1:47 p.m.

NEW ORLEANS -- Battered by Hurricane Katrina, Tulane University announced a major downsizing that will eliminate the jobs of a third of its medical-school faculty, do away with 22 programs of study and suspend eight sports.

"We are determined to find opportunity in the face of adversity," said Tulane President Scott S. Cowen, who in recent weeks has been visiting displaced Tulane students around the country to encourage them to return to the school next year.

Tulane officials said the restructuring is necessary because of $200 million in storm recovery costs this year and a "significant" budget shortfall projected for 2006, when the school's incoming freshman class is expected to be smaller. Prior to Hurricane Katrina, Tulane had about 6,400 undergraduates and about 5,000 graduate and professional students.

Hardest hit in the restructuring will be the Tulane School of Medicine, where the jobs of 180 of its 545 faculty members will be eliminated. Because of changing health-care needs and the reduced population of New Orleans, university officials said they plan to downsize the medical school's clinical operations and put added emphasis on research and educational programs.

Tulane also said it plans to eliminate the positions of 53 of its 550 nonmedical faculty members, including those of 26 tenured professors.

"I deeply regret that employee reductions were necessary to secure the university's future," Mr. Cowen said. "We have tried to make the reductions as strategically and humanely as possible, recognizing the hardship it places on those whose positions have been terminated."

University officials said they will also eliminate six undergraduate majors -- primarily in engineering -- affecting 228 students. It also plans to halt admissions to 16 graduate and professional programs impacting about 112 students. The university said students enrolled in the targeted programs will be allowed to continue their studies if they can finish degree requirements by May 2007.

The university plans to suspend eight of 14 sports affecting about a third of its 300 student athletes. Targeted sports include men and women's golf and tennis; women's swimming and diving; women's soccer and men's track and field.

Tulane said it had been assured by NCAA officials that, despite the cuts, it will receive waivers that will allow it to continue to compete on a Division I level.

Re: but they're still NCAA Division I!

[potatohead.livejournal.com]

Didn't you know that basketball is more important than things like research and saving people's lives?

Abandon ship!

[mr-flippant.livejournal.com]

We had a guest speaker in my urban planning class that used to be a prof at Tulane and was also head of some city planning organization. His position was that, due to environmental challenges (saltwater penetration into the Mississippi), the natural geography of the region, and pollution from the oil interests, New Orleans was not sustainable.

With the education system a mess, cancer rates spiking, and a dwindling economy on top of all that, he actually said that Katrina may have been the best thing to happen to some folks in the area.