You gave the information necessary to contact me to your buddy. However he or she may have obtained it is still in the air. I need not "accuse" you of anything; you've already admitted that you forwarded a copy of the post and comments.
My "damage", Heather, is not only your action, but the way you defend yourself. I figured that would be obvious.
I do appreciate the fact that you were direct and didn't hide behind a bunch of bullshit.
And, regardless of your sex (please don't take this wrong): it does make you "a real man" in my eyes.. or a "real woman", if that's more comfortable for you.
I wonder-wonder-wonder how they got it, considering it isn't listed in my userinfo. Wonder-wonder-wonder.
That sounds like an accusation. Considering the post was directed at me, I am right to take offense.
I'm done with this whole topic.
I'm sorry that not everybody can be an adult. I was concerned that people were talking behind a friend's back, and wanted to get his side of the story. Considering the seriousness of the accusations involved, I felt it best to involve a mutual friend with considerable experience in the law regarding photography in public places. I can't defend the actions of a third, unrelated party that might have gotten ahold of the communication either out of context, or who wasn't intended to see it. Maybe I need to take everybody involved (on my side) aside and explain to them what my intentions were, and that flaming people out of context is not appropriate in any situation.
However, consider the following: nothing on LJ is ever private. It would have eventually come out, because there are servers who's whole job it is to archive "private" posts and make them public. Additionally, there are thousands of hands who have access to the information stored on LJ's servers: any one of these hands could release sentitive posts and information. As I was instructed twenty years ago when I first started calling BBS's: never put anything into an online system that you wouldn't mind the whole world knowing about.
On a personal note: I genuinely, sincerely apologize that you had your personal space violated. That was not appropriate, and the person who did that deserves (and will get from me) a good tounge lashing. How they got your E-Mail address I can only guess .. (and I have a pretty good guess based on your apparent common hobbies).
Also, I'm not totally insensitive.. I'm deeply troubled that I picked a horrible time to start a flame-war on substitute's LJ. I was completely unaware of his recent medical issues, as I'm a few degrees of seperation from him directly anyway (and live almost 1000 miles away).
I have 20 hours of driving ahead of me. Be assured I will spend a significant time in reflective thought over this issue.
Slide the "adult card" right back on into the deck.
I was concerned that people were talking behind a friend's back, and wanted to get his side of the story.
S'funny; this is the first time you've alluded to friendship, or indeed, a relationship surpassing anything but "I know the guy".
However, consider the following: nothing on LJ is ever private.
Consider this also: you have violated LJ's TOS by showing a copy of a filtered post to people not privy to said filter. Should I be a squealer also? Please. It's beneath me.
And finally,
I'm done with this whole topic.
Now that the damage is done, that means absolutely nothing. It's too late, the way I see it. You can try to be the bigger person by backing out now, after you've caused this big kerfuckle, but I doubt anyone with an ounce of good sense is fooled.
I suggest you do think about the issue, long and hard.
I tried to do that previously. All you did was further bite off my head.
I don't apologize for forwarding the post to "morven". He was being seriously accused of allegedly major crimes behind his back. I was worried for his sake, and for the sake of mutual friends who are more directly connected between us.
I also can't apologize for other people's reactions to your personal comments. I can only apologize that you had your personal space violated because of my actions (which I did).
Any apology due Conrad is only appropriate if/when Conrad asks for it. Perhaps, when he feels better and we can talk about it without upsetting each other, it will come out. Only then would it be genuine anyway. I did apologize for starting a flame war at a completely inappropriate time in his life.
And I'm now thoroughly done. I've delayed my departure to deal with this, and now must delay no longer.
I tried to do that previously. All you did was further bite off my head.
I didn't say apologize to *me*, I said apologize to *him*. What I say to you has absolutely no bearing on whether or not you try to make amends with him, the party who has actually been harmed by this. What the fuck do *I* care if some hysterical woman e-mails me with threats? What's she gonna do, drive to Wisconsin with her brass knuckles?
Whatever. Just whatever. You are thick of skull. I pray you get over it soon.
Also, I'm not totally insensitive.. I'm deeply troubled that I picked a horrible time to start a flame-war on substitute's LJ.
There is never, ever a good time to start a flame war on somebody's journal. If you cannot comprehend this simple fact, then I feel very sorry for the people around you. Let's hope you do, in fact, spend that time in reflective thought, rather than reflexive self-justification.
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(no subject)
Date: 2005-06-27 07:00 pm (UTC)What the fuck is your damage?
(no subject)
Date: 2005-06-27 07:02 pm (UTC)My "damage", Heather, is not only your action, but the way you defend yourself. I figured that would be obvious.
(no subject)
Date: 2005-06-27 07:03 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-06-27 07:24 pm (UTC)And, regardless of your sex (please don't take this wrong): it does make you "a real man" in my eyes.. or a "real woman", if that's more comfortable for you.
*sigh*
(no subject)
Date: 2005-06-27 07:15 pm (UTC)That sounds like an accusation. Considering the post was directed at me, I am right to take offense.
I'm done with this whole topic.
I'm sorry that not everybody can be an adult. I was concerned that people were talking behind a friend's back, and wanted to get his side of the story. Considering the seriousness of the accusations involved, I felt it best to involve a mutual friend with considerable experience in the law regarding photography in public places. I can't defend the actions of a third, unrelated party that might have gotten ahold of the communication either out of context, or who wasn't intended to see it. Maybe I need to take everybody involved (on my side) aside and explain to them what my intentions were, and that flaming people out of context is not appropriate in any situation.
However, consider the following: nothing on LJ is ever private. It would have eventually come out, because there are servers who's whole job it is to archive "private" posts and make them public. Additionally, there are thousands of hands who have access to the information stored on LJ's servers: any one of these hands could release sentitive posts and information. As I was instructed twenty years ago when I first started calling BBS's: never put anything into an online system that you wouldn't mind the whole world knowing about.
On a personal note: I genuinely, sincerely apologize that you had your personal space violated. That was not appropriate, and the person who did that deserves (and will get from me) a good tounge lashing. How they got your E-Mail address I can only guess .. (and I have a pretty good guess based on your apparent common hobbies).
Also, I'm not totally insensitive.. I'm deeply troubled that I picked a horrible time to start a flame-war on
I have 20 hours of driving ahead of me. Be assured I will spend a significant time in reflective thought over this issue.
(no subject)
Date: 2005-06-27 07:24 pm (UTC)If you want to take it that way.
I'm sorry that not everybody can be an adult.
Slide the "adult card" right back on into the deck.
I was concerned that people were talking behind a friend's back, and wanted to get his side of the story.
S'funny; this is the first time you've alluded to friendship, or indeed, a relationship surpassing anything but "I know the guy".
However, consider the following: nothing on LJ is ever private.
Consider this also: you have violated LJ's TOS by showing a copy of a filtered post to people not privy to said filter. Should I be a squealer also? Please. It's beneath me.
And finally,
I'm done with this whole topic.
Now that the damage is done, that means absolutely nothing. It's too late, the way I see it. You can try to be the bigger person by backing out now, after you've caused this big kerfuckle, but I doubt anyone with an ounce of good sense is fooled.
I suggest you do think about the issue, long and hard.
(no subject)
Date: 2005-06-27 07:27 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-06-27 07:30 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-06-27 07:37 pm (UTC)I don't apologize for forwarding the post to "morven". He was being seriously accused of allegedly major crimes behind his back. I was worried for his sake, and for the sake of mutual friends who are more directly connected between us.
I also can't apologize for other people's reactions to your personal comments. I can only apologize that you had your personal space violated because of my actions (which I did).
Any apology due Conrad is only appropriate if/when Conrad asks for it. Perhaps, when he feels better and we can talk about it without upsetting each other, it will come out. Only then would it be genuine anyway. I did apologize for starting a flame war at a completely inappropriate time in his life.
And I'm now thoroughly done. I've delayed my departure to deal with this, and now must delay no longer.
(no subject)
Date: 2005-06-27 07:45 pm (UTC)I didn't say apologize to *me*, I said apologize to *him*. What I say to you has absolutely no bearing on whether or not you try to make amends with him, the party who has actually been harmed by this. What the fuck do *I* care if some hysterical woman e-mails me with threats? What's she gonna do, drive to Wisconsin with her brass knuckles?
Whatever. Just whatever. You are thick of skull. I pray you get over it soon.
(no subject)
Date: 2005-06-27 11:29 pm (UTC)There is never, ever a good time to start a flame war on somebody's journal. If you cannot comprehend this simple fact, then I feel very sorry for the people around you. Let's hope you do, in fact, spend that time in reflective thought, rather than reflexive self-justification.