The poor dear.

DING DONG THE

Southern Californians who love popular music and occasionally find themselves reading about it will be doing the Snoopy dance for days on hearing that Robert Hilburn is finally retiring. I've hated that sack of shit for 25 years now. He had the worst attitude towards music, was so predictable that parody was pointless, thought he was important because he was a rock critic, and spent a career Not Getting It but Getting Paid For It.

His classic pattern was to ignore local acts who desperately needed the boost he could give them, because they weren't at his level. And then, after they'd finally clawed their way up enough to get a good record out and some buzz from people who actually cared, Bob would arrive to bless them and announce that they were a fresh new face and Important, interview them at length, and officially apply his Seal of Rock Quality.

He compared anything good to Bob Dylan and Bruce Springsteen, and later to U2. He treated music the way a bad high school teacher treats literature: only significant for its social and moral implications. He lived in a racist world where white college kids made social commentary and brown people and foreigners made happy dance music about which he could make social commentary. He took all the budget at the Times for his salary and travel costs, leaving the actual editing to overworked part-timers who were his superiors in every way.

Robert Hilburn was a fucking hack.

We're gonna tramp the dirt down, Bob.

local news provides holy shit story

Fullerton police officer saves child from train

Autistic 13-year-old had wandered off and was spotted from a helicopter, walking on tracks with train approaching.

By JOHN McDONALD
The Orange County Register

FULLERTON - A routine search for an autistic 13-year-old boy who wandered away from a friend's house turned dramatic Tuesday night when a police helicopter crew spotted him walking on railroad tracks with a train approaching from behind, officials said.

Fullerton police raced to the scene with sirens blaring and emergency lights flashing.

Fullerton police officer Chris Bradley tore his hand open climbing a barbed-wire fence to reach the boy before the train hit him.

"It wasn't like in the movies but it was a close call," said Fullerton police Lt. Neal Baldwin.

The incident began at about 10:20 p.m., when police were called to a home on the 1900 block of Odell Place, where residents reported that Luis Perales, 13, of Garden Grove had been visiting and had wandered off. They reported that Perales is autistic and has the mental age of a 5-year-old.

"The officers also learned that the boy was infatuated by trains," said Baldwin.

The tracks of the Union Pacific and the Burlington Northern Santa Fe railroads converge just a few hundred yards from the home that the youngster had been visiting.

"We had Anaheim's helicopter check the tracks and they spotted him walking westbound about three miles away, almost in La Mirada," Baldwin said.

The helicopter crew also saw a train headed toward the youngster, approaching him from behind.

Bradley pulled the boy to safety. Bradley was taken to a hospital for his hand to be treated and Perales was reunited with his family, Baldwin said.

Day with lot fate when it is the same as lover and friend.

1. The previously reported Hausfrau Strippercize Trend now includes a company that sells portable pole-dancing equipment. An amusing and/or horrifying ad for this is viewable here (SFW). They also sell a lapdancing kit. I was not aware that lap dances required a kit. Via Adjab.
   
   
2. This lamer on the run from the cops tried a few things, including an attempted carjacking along the way in Wildomar, CA. For local reference, that's where Bob Trout lives, and he has no idea how lucky he is not to have carjacked Bob & Mary. I can imagine the story later. "He was telling Mary to give up the keys when I took the gun away. Had to take a couple fingers too. Put 'em in a baggie, poor fucker will need 'em in the joint."
   
   
3. This person shares my exact feelings about skepticism: It's a love/hate relationship.
   
   
4. High-quality crazy via mendel I forgot to mention that my life is very similar to that of the celebee or the forest guardian in the Japanese anime Pokeman Forever movie.
   
   
5. The Exploding Aardvark has today's best headline: GOAT ATTACKS COULDN'T KEEP HER FROM CHURCH.
   
   
6. This craigslist poster seems to have good values, but her language skills result in comedy: Why not to spend your evening cuddling with your love ones VS warming a chair in an office and burning your brain to be remember by whom?
   
   
7. The Vark also gave me Mondo Croquet, which reminds me of the way I played croquet in our back yard as a kid, except with BIGGER BALLS.
   
   
8. One more varklink: Where's the toxics at in my neighborhood? (USA)
   
   
9. Jalopnik linked to the most fabulously fucking awesome drifting video ever. How he doesn't roll, I do not know. Jesus Christ.

Picture without explanation

via mendel

localfilter: in which I go off about my coffeehouse

This will be uninteresting to you if you don't hang out locally, and possibly uninteresting anyway, but I finally emailed Kelly and told "Corporate" what I think of them lately.

( You blew it up! God damn you to hell! )