alone and worthy of it

[substitute]

What's worse than knowing your life is broken and won't be fixed? I'll tell you.

Today I was at D's and ran into a friend who just got out of an involuntary 72-hour hold at a mental hospital due to a suicide attempt, and who needs to restart her entire life over under appalling conditions.

And then I ran into a friend I have a useless crush on. And for the rest of the day all I could think about was how unfortunate I was in my desperately impossible desires for unreachable partners, and how pathetic a creature I was, and how I would never be happy. Etc., etc., poor little me.

God knows my life problems aren't small, and I have a right to some self pity, especially considering the near-perfect failure right of any attempt I've had to find a woman who likes me.

BUT FOR CHRISSAKES how could I be so self-absorbed to make that so important in the face of someone else's disastrous miserable mess?

If there was a "What Shakespeare character are you?" quiz I think I would be Bottom. Certainly not worthy of Hamlet status.

Comments

[brieweeherman.livejournal.com]

the fact that you wrote all this is admirable...you didn't have to realize the situation at all. most people wouldn't. most people (including myself) would not think to put their own misfortunes into perspective that way. i commend you!