teen maenad mall rampage flashback

[substitute]

In 1997 I had a very close call. I was living in Kansas City at the time. I went to the mall to get something you get at malls like underwear or light bulbs, and when I came out of a store I noticed lots of security guys and roadies, and something being set up that looked like a big stage. I asked what was going on and they said that current teen sensation "Hanson" was playing. I fled, and noticed as I peeled out of the parking lot that there was a mass of > 1000 teenagers being held in a sort of feeding pen in one corner of the parking lot about to be loosed into the mall. It would have been as bad as this disaster, I bet. I would have been turned into Chick Fil-A in moments.