Mother! Father! Don't touch it! It's EMO!

[substitute]

The EEG lady said that my pattern of injury is often associated with the following:

• inability to form intimate relationships despite other social successes;
  
  
• self-hatred far out of proportion to the evidence;
  
  
• hypercritical judgment of self and others;
  
  
• discomfort in crowds;
  
  
• inability to clean up or organize personal space due to emotional overload when attempting to do so;
  
  
• overcompensation with intellectual success to combat social failure;
  
  
• a sleep schedule that is about four hours "late";
  
  
• complete overwhelming collapse on being confronted with multiple tasks at once;
  
  
• depression and anxiety that feel surprising or out of place even as they are occurring;

I mean, damn. I'm surprised my eye color wasn't in there. I'm skeptical and wary of diagnostic lists that seem to dovetail to my life, having had a few of them over the years that falsely promised some discovery, but this is just plain eery.

I keep having experiences lately where I'm talking to someone who wanders away in mid conversation. Or other forms of communication: I IM someone and they don't respond and then sign off, or I send email that goes into the Void.

I'm not at all sure if it's significant, or if it happens to me more or less than it happens to others. In any case I find it harder to write it off when this happens lately. I'm far less socially confident than I was a couple years ago, and it's easy now for me to slip into a near-paranoid assumption that the other person dislikes me and is hoping I'll go away.

This despite the fact that it's more likely that the other person is having a multitasking failure or distracted in some way. As with most of my brain lightning problems, it's egotistical.

In any case I cannot tell whether I'm getting a "keep the hell away" signal from some people I know or not. I'm glad that I at least know that I don't know, and that I have Occam's Razor in my medicine cabinet.

Comments

[spacemummy.livejournal.com]

Hmm, should have read the comment above.

[substitute.livejournal.com]

Yeah, it's exactly that; a head injury pattern. Apparently it's often a delayed response over a period of years, and can result from problems in birth and infancy. But adult head injury victims show up for neurofeedback evaluation a lot too, obviously.

[spacemummy.livejournal.com]

This is all too strange. Sorry to jump all over this, but if this theory (?) has any validity, it may explain some things. I mean, I never considered that these events might explain some of my emotional/psychological difficulties.

personal history:
--forceps baby
--8 stitches in head and concussion, age 9
--fight in which I suffered some eye injury and tooth damage, age 14
--another fight that involved several kicks to the head, age 16
--near drowning and insulin shock, age 17
--head injury and loss of consciousness after fall: stupid trick jumping to a tree from the roof of house, age 19
--6 months ago, fell off my bike and lost consciousness after drinking. 3 weeks of tooth and facial pain that seems to have cleared up by itself. Probably a hairline fracture, but I refused to go to a clinic-- pure idiocy.

Sorry to catalog. Somehow it helps. I did a comic called The Amnesia Kid's Greatest Hits where I parodied all the head injury. Also, there's a well-written science fiction book about a character that suffers head wounds called Humpty Dumpty: an oval by Damon Knight.

Lately, the insomnia is really getting to me. And my mood has gotten very dark. Maybe I can find some affordable neurofeedback option. Breathing exercises used to get me through, but I'm having difficulty concentrating on anything.

[substitute.livejournal.com]

Yeah, she talked about forceps babies, concussions that were written off, anoxia due to near drowning, etc. If what she's saying is right, there's a good chance that at least some of your problems are injury-related and could benefit from neurofeedback. I'm very new at this so I don't have a good critical perspective yet.

Example information: http://www.eegspectrum.com/Applications/TraumaticBrain/TraumaticBrainIntro/

[spacemummy.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the heads up. Uh, sorry. I'm interested in hearing about the results you gain from therapy.

THE PICTURE OF GOOD HEALTH

[substitute.livejournal.com]

Re: THE PICTURE OF GOOD HEALTH

[threepunchstuff.livejournal.com]

I think it's no accident that Aspiring, Moral, Perfecting and Reflective are the spheres that are suffocated by wearing the ironic trucker hat.

Re: THE PICTURE OF GOOD HEALTH

[spacemummy.livejournal.com]

Found this link some time ago and just revisited. May be useful?

[spacemummy.livejournal.com]

As for people seeming to disappear in mid-converation, I believe that attention spans are getting so short that it's difficult to even call it rudeness, or inconsideration. It's some kind of zombification.