If you want the spa chair you haven't had that bitch's hands on you

[substitute]

A year later it turned out he had Alzheimer’s the whole time. They kept giving us all this awful food. I wanted to see what was in the bag just out of curiosity. No, I was the one who was admiring his ass. She’s married still and I think she takes it seriously. The backpack is seriously bigger than she is. I’m all about a good zombie game. I had a good visit with your mom, and I lent her some books that I think are very mind expanding. When did two hours become a long time? She called up and the first thing she said was “you have sharp knives!” One of the two of us is being a real pill. I hoped it was some kind of radical feminist thing, darn. They’re sweet enough that you can cook them without peeling which is a huge plus.

I didn’t say I was reasonable, just that I’d be honest.